Zen Supermom: The Mental Fitness Podcast

Why is it so hard to say no to your kids without feeling guilty?

Alena Gomes Rodrigues Season 5 Episode 191

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0:00 | 30:13

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Why does saying "no" to your kids feel so much harder than it should?

You know boundaries are important.

You know your kids need them.

So why do you keep:

  • explaining one more time,
  • giving one more chance,
  • feeling guilty every time they get upset,
  • and end up exploding anyway?

For years, I thought I had a boundary problem.

I didn't.

I had a nervous system that had learned, long before I became a mom, that standing up for myself wasn't safe. And that the only effective boundary is punishment - which I hated as a child, and did not want to repeat as a mother.

In this episode, I share one small memory from my own childhood that completely changed how I understand:

  • people-pleasing
  • guilt
  • healthy boundaries
  • and why so many loving mums struggle to say "no."

If you've ever thought:

"Why do I feel like such a bad mom every time I set a boundary?"

...this episode is for you.


In this episode you'll learn:

✔ Why boundaries feel so uncomfortable for many moms

✔ Where people-pleasing really comes from

✔ Why parenting advice alone isn't enough

✔ Why anger isn't the problem, but a signal

✔ How your childhood still influences your parenting today

✔ The missing step before gentle parenting techniques actually work

💛 Want to learn more about the mental fitness practice for busy moms?

We're currently running the beta, and public enrollment opens later this year.

Join the priority list here: https://alenagomesrodrigues.com/priority-list/


Or simply send me an email:

hi@zensupermom.com

Tell me where you lose your patience most often.

I personally read every email.

#gentleparenting #momrage #nervoussystem #peoplepleasing #boundaries #parenting #zensupermom



Support the show

Hi, I’m Alena - founder of Zen Supermom and creator of the IDTR method (Intergenerational Developmental Trauma Repatterning).

I work with thoughtful, committed parents who have already tried to understand themselves - and still find themselves reacting under pressure in ways they don’t want.

My work focuses on changing the underlying pattern that formed early, shows up in the nervous system under stress, and gets passed on to the next generation unless addressed as a whole.

🎧 Start here – Mommy Tantrum Masterclass
Find out what’s really driving your reactions with your kids — and what to do next.
👉 Watch the Mommy Tantrum Masterclass

📚 My book – I Yelled, I Cried, I Healed
Get the Zen Supermom book here:
👉 I YELLED, I CRIED, I HEALED (book on Amazon.com)

More about me & my work:
 👉 https://www.alenagomesrodrigues.com


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